"Winning the battle over Anger" - part I

Anger is a major problem in our society. For the most part it is a problem that has been ignored. Violence is increasing in every area of our society. (a little girl said - "Mom how come all the idiots only come out when dad is driving?") I want to deal with this subject so we can recognize and deal with our hurts and anger in better ways. For there are correct and appropriate ways anger can be expressed, but most people have not mastered that. Anger should be expressed constructively in a positive way.

We will learn some Biblical ways of expressing and dealing with our anger. Have you ever heard the excuse, "I just can't help it?" "That's just the way I am?" - That doesn't fly as a believer. For we are to be led by and controlled by the Holy Spirit. God does not want us out of control. That is the realm of the devil. See Eph 4:26-27 "In your anger do not sin": Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold."

One of the important aspects of anger to recognize is that it is for the most part a secondary emotion. Usually something like being hurt by another person causes the emotion of anger to arise. The fact is we are going to be hurt by others, even repeatedly. So how do you deal with conflict in your relationships right now? Do you get mad saying to yourself "I'll get even", or do you just withdraw, feeling sorry for yourself? or maybe you just try to push the feelings of anger down, deny that you really are angry. We all have many ways that we deal with our feelings of hurt that are ineffective and often destructive to both us and others. It is vitally important that we live in God's ways.

The 1st. Step is: Get God's Understanding of yourself - For we don't do a very good job of evaluating ourselves. Our prayer should be: Ps 139:23-24 23 "Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. 24 See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting."

As you wait on God for understanding of what it is that is truly making you angry you must be patient. To not do this will cause problems in your other relationships. For example something at work may have happened that has made you mad, but if you don't deal with it, when you get home your wife or children may suffer for it. There's a great story in the Bible of Balaam and His donkey. Balaam was upset with his donkey because he didn't recognize the real reason he was angry. That being that God wasn't doing what he wanted. Num 22:22-23 "But God was very angry when he went, and the angel of the LORD stood in the road to oppose him. Balaam was riding on his donkey, and his two servants were with him. 23 When the donkey saw the angel of the LORD standing in the road with a drawn sword in his hand, she turned off the road into a field. Balaam beat her to get her back on the road." You have to read this story for yourself to find why Balaam said, Praise God for the donkey! Can you imagine Balaam trying to tell his family and friends about what happened?  Your donkey started talking & you talked back? Having received some understanding of why you are angry, it is then important to wait before doing anything. For any anger must be expressed appropriately.

Our 2nd. Step: Focus on God's Word & accept it! James 1:19-27 19 " Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, 20 for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. 21 Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you. " Prov 29:11 "A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control."

Our 3rd. Step: Use your tongue to bless! Jam. 1:26 "If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless..." Do you want to reap anger and violence? Or blessings? How has your tongue been used lately?

Conclusion: God's ways are best for our lives in every way! The first step in having God really bless you is to ask forgiveness ( Thankfully, God has already provided it!) Then repent - that is turn from your ways to God's ways in your life. You may have given the Devil a foothold in your life and need prayer for it. Take time today to ask God for understanding, to search our hearts & for help in being committed to His Word.